The past couple of months, I’ve taken a step back, and you know what? It’s been nice.
I’ve concentrated on the job that actually pays my bills, to good effect. I’ve taken up meditation and committed to my yoga practice. I’ve witnessed a flat-out miracle with my cat. Probably that was the biggest reason for the change – in late March, the vet thought Zoe was saying good-bye to us. My beloved cat was undergoing chemotherapy and losing weight consistently. We made the decision to stop chemo, and I prepared myself for the worst. However, she never stopped eating and seemed to pick up some energy after the treatments stopped. Eventually I weighed her and found out she had put back about half a pound. The vet, completely puzzled, said perhaps she’d been too aggressive with the chemo and it was actually making her sicker than the cancer itself. Let her be for a while and let’s see what happens, she said. That was four months ago, and Zoe is still tossing her catitude about with abandon. She’s still too thin, but has kept on the weight she re-gained. How long will this last? I don’t know, and I’ve trying my best not to concern myself with it. She’s here now. I’ll enjoy the time I get.
Very likely, I would just continue on with this new level of detached zen if it weren’t for one thing – the Alive & Running 5K, to be held on September 30.
This is the cause most dear to my heart. I’ve survived bouts of severe depression. I arrange my life – how much exercise I get, how much sleep I get, the people with whom I surround myself – around what will maintain my mental health and positivity. It’s the equivalent of a diabetic taking their insulin, and it works. But I’m not sure I’d be around to keep up these day-to-day precautions if it weren’t for competent and compassionate counselors that have helped me through the harder times. If I hadn’t had a supportive family who got me to counseling in the first place, so I could see that it helped, that I didn’t have to muscle through depression on my own.
Seen at last year’s 5K, one of many people lost to suicide.
Unfortunately for my detachment, the most effective way to raise funds for Alive & Running is my old nemesis, Facebook. So, I must return to it, and find a way to do it without getting sucked in to the political debates and the keeping-up-with-the-Joneses attitude that pervades social media. I don’t want to. I’d like to leave Facebook be and grow in the mindfulness of real life that I have been cultivating for the past couple of months. But then again…
Maybe this is the next step in my personal evolution. Learning to see social media as the tool that it is, something that can be wielded for good or ill, just like a hammer or a wrench. Facebook, too, can bludgeon or build, depending on how it is used. I shall endeavor to build.
I welcome your company on the journey. Let’s evolve together.
Kimberly welcomes your company at the Alive & Running 5K, too. Please click on the link and learn more about this event that brings hope to world in desperate need of it.
